The one where the Sixth Doctor fights a sparkly despot, Peri screams a lot, and H.G. Wells accidentally takes notes for every sci-fi book he’ll ever write.
Short Synopsis
The Doctor and Peri arrive on the planet Karfel, where an over-the-top tyrant called the Borad rules with an iron fist and a sparkly belt. Time tunnels, mutant experiments, and suspiciously convenient foreshadowing of H.G. Wells’ future novels ensue.
Extended Storyline
The adventure begins when the Doctor and Peri are pulled toward Karfel — a planet last seen in the Third Doctor era (allegedly), though no one remembers it because this is the first time we’re hearing about it. The planet is under the thumb of the Borad, a mutant tyrant who looks like someone grafted a fish onto half a man’s face and then stuck him in a sparkly cloak. He rules with the help of android guards, bad mood lighting, and his favorite weapon: the “Timelash,” a glitzy time corridor that looks like it was made from leftover tinsel.
The Borad is assisted by Tekker, played with all the subtlety of a pantomime villain by Paul Darrow (yes, Avon from Blake’s 7). Darrow spends most of the story chewing scenery, glaring dramatically, and generally making Colin Baker’s Doctor look subdued by comparison — which is saying something.
Meanwhile, Peri spends a good chunk of time getting kidnapped, tied up, and menaced by a mutant. It’s not her best outing. The Doctor, on the other hand, gets caught up in Karfel’s political mess: rebels, loyalists, and the Borad’s plan to unleash chaos with a handy time-based doomsday device.
And then there’s Herbert. A bumbling, wide-eyed young man who stows away in the TARDIS and tags along for the adventure. The Doctor is irritated, Peri is exasperated, and the audience slowly realizes this is supposed to be H.G. Wells. The story winks and nudges at this constantly: Herbert is fascinated by time travel, monsters, and dystopian societies — you know, the things that’ll make him famous in about 30 years.
As the plot spirals into chaos, the Doctor faces off against the Borad, who reveals his evil plan: he wants to repopulate the planet with himself and Peri. Yes, half-fish, half-man, all-creepy intends to make Peri the mother of a mutant dynasty. This is the moment the story stops being campy and becomes deeply uncomfortable. Fortunately, the Doctor manages to dispatch him into the Timelash, where he’s flung into the past to be mistaken for the Loch Ness Monster. Yes, really.
But wait — plot twist! That was just a clone of the Borad. The real Borad sticks around for another round of villain speeches before the Doctor ejects him into the path of a Bandril missile (because every 80s Doctor Who episode needed a random alien missile). That’s two deaths for the price of one — bargain!
Herbert, of course, gets dropped off in his own time, clutching notes that will someday inspire his novels. The Doctor and Peri leave Karfel behind, probably hoping the planet will govern itself without any more sparkly despots or mutant marriage proposals.